For those of you who haven't heard this wonderful little term of endearment, "bridezilla" is defined as:
"A bride-to-be who focuses so much on the event that she becomes difficult and obnoxious."
Apparently I am one. Because I reminded our caterer that we hadn't yet gotten the quote and contract (that she said she'd give me 2 months ago). Because I want to choose both a silk flower for my hair and a long necklace to wear with my wedding dress. Because I've chosen to buy mismatched champagne glasses from Goodwill instead of renting matchy-matchy ones from a party rental company. Because I said I wasn't feeling the stringy, wet 80's look my hair had (as opposed to the soft shiny wave I asked for) when my stylist did "practice hair" last night. Because my florist didn't return my call for a week.
Yes, I want things to look a certain way and run smoothly on my wedding day, but I'm not expecting perfection by any means. Mostly, yes, I'd like people who I'm paying good money to to actually respond to me in a timely manner and to fully commit to their services so I don't have to scramble at the last minute to find new vendors. But no, I have not been a bitch or demanding to anyone. I feel I've overall been pretty darn kind and patient.
With one exception. It was after a really long day of bridesmaid dress shopping, without lunch, to my non-pregnant sister when she wanted to choose a frumpy shit-brown maternity dress to wear for the wedding above all the other actually pretty dresses she tried on. I had a bitchy moment, yes, and I own that.
The point I'm trying to make is that this "bridezilla" stereotype is so prevalent now that no matter what you do, or how nice you act, you get the bridezilla label if you're a bride. Especially if your salary precludes you from hiring a $20,000 wedding planner, and you have to be a DIY bride.
Case in point: I am an events coordinator for a living. I talk to venues and caterers and vendors all the time! Never once have any of those sales reps acted like I was being bitchy or demanding when I've asked to change a floor plan at the last minute, or tweak a menu. That's just what professional vendors expect in business. Plans change. But if you're a bride, then you better keep your damn mouth shut.
Harrumph.
PS. That show "Bridezillas" on WE? I never really liked it to begin with, but just recently I realized how racist, classist, exploitative, and really un-funny it is.
